2009 Approaches~

As the daughter of alcoholics, whose first husband was an abusive alcoholic, New Year's Eve is not an occasion I enjoy. My ex's birthday was December 26th, so he always insisted we have a big open house since the tree was still up and the house (with 3 rambunctious kids) was clean and decorated as well. I shudder as I recall his changing, mid-party, from funny-guy-wearing-lampshade to an angry abuser, from Jekyll into Hyde.

Years after the divorce, I continued to dread the holidays that lent themselves to occasions to binge. Finally, now, after 28 years of a second marriage, to a man who has an occasional glass of wine or a cold beer in summer, I've begun to enjoy New Year's in my own way. Yes, it is a time to reflect, to resolve to make some personal changes...yeah, to lose the weight! To walk more, hoping to regain some physical strength.

So December became my time to have a long talk with my primary care physician and have her refer me to some specialists to get me on the right path. X-rays of my arthritic knees were taken, and I see a doctor tomorrow to determine if steroid injections or other non-surgical options are indicated.

Now that 2009 is just a few days away, I also intend to be kinder and more attentive to my spouse. I believe he may have come to the same conclusion; he was unable to sleep last night, and got up and CLEANED, emptied the dishwasher, tidied up the Christmas card 'mess'...you know, the address books, the stickers, the stamps, copies of our family Christmas letter, cards and boxes... so this morning, I actually could see the dining room table again!

Last evening, he wanted to take me out to Applebee's with gift cards we'd gotten, but I'm coming down with a cold, and showering and dressing up and driving over in a cold rain...not the best plan. So we went online, selected what we wanted, called Applebee's To Go line, and he drove over and picked up our meals in 20 minutes. Perfect!

Today, my cold is truly settling in, so he volunteered...honest! this was amazing...he volunteered to take the grocery list and go to WalMart and pick up what we needed. HUH? 'Who are you, fellow, and what have you done with my husband?'

Now, back to New Year's resolutions: We've had small dinner parties in previous years, and are invited this year to an open house by a really interesting couple. I suspect my cold will have reached stage 2, so we'll probably stay home. And have a glass of wine. And watch the ball drop on TV, if we manage to stay awake that long! Resolutions? To appreciate a spouse who steps up to the plate when necessary, who realizes my bad knee keeps me from some chores, who doesn't go from Jekyll to Hyde. Oh, he has occasions when he gets a bit temperamental and narcissistic...Ooops!

Happy New Year, all!